Kriselda Gray

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

Maybe this interview with Carl Jung will help. He discusses after this life towards the last part of the interview.

https://www.openculture.com/2012/07/fac ... _life.html

"Man cannot stand a meaningless life."

[Kriselda Gray]

Maybe this interview with Carl Jung will help. He discusses after this life towards the last part of the interview.

https://www.openculture.com/2012/07/fac ... _life.html

"Man cannot stand a meaningless life."

Thanks! I'll check that out!

[Patagoniagirl]

The Universe is a good place to expound on your fears. The Fogbow is excellent too. I have always been terrified of death except when severely depressed and then I didn't care.

But chronic pain will also bring you to that even if you are terrified of it. I have often pondered what comes after death. I do know it's not pearly gates or burning hell. I think it's being every where and knowing everything. I could be wrong.

[Kriselda Gray]

The Universe is a good place to expound on your fears. The Fogbow is excellent too. I have always been terrified of death except when severely depressed and then I didn't care.

I understand that Right now I actually consider it something of a good thing that I'm able to feel terrified about it because then I know my depression isn't as bad as it can get. I just wish I could do that without the actual fear and repetitive thoughts.

But chronic pain will also bring you to that even if you are terrified of it. I have often pondered what comes after death. I do know it's not pearly gates or burning hell. I think it's being every where and knowing everything. I could be wrong.

I like your view of it. It sounds beautiful and peaceful.

My fear of death being that I'm left as an awareness left alone in a void comes from my experiences when under anesthesia. During that time, I'm aware that time is passing and of my own existence, and that there is nothing and no one else around. There's complete sensory deprivation, and I have no idea how long it will last. It's the most frightening, horrific experience I've had, and I've had to undergo it a few times. (The last time I had surgery, they had to give me Valium or something similar to calm me down enough to get the anesthesia IV started.)

Thankfully, getting it out and on the page, along with the suggestions and words of encouragement I've gotten do seem to be helping get the looming feeling to back off at least some. I've quite grateful for that!

[Kriselda Gray]

I was reading Orly_licious' post about the "Super Sized Salon" show, but thought I'd respond here to keep that thread more for the fans of the show...

And -- Jamie just dropped her new merchandise:

It's been a long time since I was last able to go shopping and see how clothes sizes are running these days, but from what I recall, neither Jamie nor any of the woman working for her could wear a 3XL (22-24) - which is the largest size offered for the t-shirts. This is, I realize, more likely a function of what's available in online merch stores as opposed to a decision on Jamie's part not to carry larger sizes, but I still find is kind of sad and ironic for a show that's presented as being fat positive.

[Kriselda Gray]

I'm currently on Hulu to stream live TV and my local channels. Ive been having a problem, though, with some of the streams of certain channels - MSNBC in particular - freezing fairly regularly. This forces me to go back to my home page and reload the Hulu app and then MSNBC and hope that "rebooted" it enough to have MSNBC streaming again.

I've been looking at several of the options available, but don't know how good the quality of their streams are or if I'd just run I to the same kind of problem.

Whichever service I use will need to carry MSNBC, History Channel and Bravo, as well as my local channels. So far, Sling and possibly Dish streaming (NOT their satellite service) are looking the most likely. YouTube is out becuse it doesn't have all the channels I need.

If you have any experience with either Sling or Dish streaming, I'd love to hear your impressions. Or, if you have another streaming service that you really like, let me know about that, too.

Thanks!

[Kriselda Gray]

28 years ago today, my husband and I got married. Our "courtship" (if you can call it thatl) has several of my favorite memories. I know I've told the story before, but I think it's been quite a while and I hope no one minds my repeating it.

So, we never exactly dated. We'd been good friends for about 6 years and frequently hung out at my place or with our mutuall friends. I'd just recently had wrist surgery and couldnt type well, so he'd been coming over to help me with typing on the local bulletin boards. One night, we just sort of ended up kissing - were still not sure how or who started it - and decided to just kind of see what happened. We pretty much just kept on hanging out together like we had been over the next 6 weeks or so.

One evening, we were snuggling on my couch, and he said could stay like that forever. I said I could too. The next thing I knew, he was up jumping around the room and excitedly saying he couldnt believe he was getting married! I was just sort of watching him and wondering what he was going on about, until suddenly it hit me he meant he was getting married to ME. Then I got all hyper, too. That was the closest thing we had to a proposal.

Several days later, he asked my Dad for his permission (I'd asked him to as i knew it would mean a LOT to Dad.) Dad started crying and then called Mom into the room. (Quick side note - I'm 7 years older than my husband and Mom was 11 years older than Dad.) He told her what my now-hubby had just asked, to which her immediate response was "Isn't he a bit young for you?" I don't think I'd ever seen my Dad laugh so hard!

When we went to tell his parents, his dad was i their living room and he called his mom over. As his mom was walking over to a chair, he blurted out the news. His Mom nearly fell over at the shock. Apparently she hadn't yet figured out we were a couple.

We decided to wait about a year to get married so we could save up some money for the wedding and starting out expenses. A couple months after that, I got a call at work from my company's workman's comp insurance company telling me I'd be getting a settlement from them for the permanent damage to my wrist. What was interesting about that is that I hadn't considered the wrist problem to be a job-related injury mainly because of how much time I spent typing off the clock. The ins company told me I would have a 3% permanent lost of use in the wrist, and that they usually didn't pay out anything for less than a 5% lose of use, but we're making an exception. That settlement let us put a down payment on the house were still living in today.

We wanted a Halloween wedding, but it was on a Monday that year and our mothers ganged up on us over it being inconvenient for their guests, so it got changed to the 29th. At our wedding, he wore a black pants and a black velvet tail coat with a burgundy brocade vest that was cut low in front and an ivory shirt with lace cascading from the collar to the vest closure and lace cuffs. I wore a black velvet jacket with a sweetheart neckline, slightly puffed shoulders, those little, tiny buttons down the front, and a peplum that was a bit longer in back than in front. I also had a burgundy brocade skirt that had an overlay of black lace that went over about 3/4 of the skirt, leaving a gap in the center front so the skirt itself could be seen. My bridesmaids and I carried candles instead of flowers. Our processional music was the track "Promentory" from the Last of the Mohicans soundtrack.



It hardly seems like it's been almost 30 years. I don't feel old enough to have been married that long! It's been pretty tough at times because of my health issues, but there's been a lot of happiness, too, and we agree it's been worth it.

If you actually read all this, thanks!

[bill_g]

Wow. What a story Kris. Thanks. And congrats on 30yrs. That's an accomplishment in any era.

[Slim Cognito]

What a wonderful story and unique wedding. Love it!!

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[Fiascoist]

what fun little stories about you and your husband's history. Love the wedding attire, so creative.

[AndyinPA]

Congratulations. Wonderful story,

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

I love "how we got together" and wedding stories!!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!!

[Foggy]

Congratulations, Kris.

[jemcanada2]

Congratulations

[Kriselda Gray]

Thank you, everyone!

[Phoenix520]

Happy Anniversary!! Thirty years is the blink of an eye when you’re in the right place.

I love your story, and I can picture the two of you at the alter. Thanks .

[Kriselda Gray]

Ugh.

Just needing to throw a bit of a pity party, no need to Indulge me, just need to get it out of my system.

I'm trying to write this as short as i can (which is still pretty damn long), so some things may be a bit of "Well, why can't you blah, blah, blah..." I can explain it if necessary, but trust me, there are reasons.

So, starting with the smaller issue: I love playing Computer games, but had to give up MMORPGs when I found I just spent waaaaay too much money in their "unnecessary (but cool looking/acting) goodies" stores, and rarely find standalone games that look interesting. Well, today I found one - probably as close to perfect for me as I could get (yes, Norse stuff and one several of my fellow Heathens have talked about being much more accurate than most Viking Age stuff.)

The problem is that my right shoulder has been acting up pretty bad lately, and when I went to pull over my laptop to buy it and start playing, the weight of the laptop screwed it up even more. So not only am I in more pain, but until/if it gets better, I can't use the computer (unless I want to call one of the guys in to set it up for me and put it back every time I want to play, which, no. They do too much for me already.)

Normally, this wouldn't be more than a few moments of disappointment, but coming right now on top of the BIG issue, I just didn't need it. (BTW I usually use a tablet for my net stuff, which, thankfully, is light enough not to make problems worse.)

So, the big issue: My caretaker has moved in with us. Through a convoluted series of stuff NOT of his doing, he lost his home, can't afford an apartment by himself, would not do well with a stranger as a roommate and we're not letting him live in his car.

The thing is, while he's one of the nicest guys you can meet, he's very socially awkward - to the extent that I often wonder if he's on the spectrum. I enjoy his company most of the time, and i really do try to be as patient and understanding as i can be, but there are times I just NEED a break. Up until now, that break was the two days when my husband is off work and can take care of me himself. Now the only time our friend won't be here is when he's at work. It also means I'm going to lose almost all my time with my husband since we usually sleep when our friend works, and when they're both here they're out in the living room together and I'm stuck in the bedroom.

I've known this was coming for a while, but now that it's here, I'm just feeling swamped. Part of why not being able to play that game (or any other that uses the laptop) is that it would have just let me escape for several hours while playing it.

There's nothing I can do to fix any of this, but I couldn't keep I all bottled up, either. My husband knows how hard this is, but like I said, we're not going to let our friend live in his car.

[Volkonski]

[Foggy]

I can send hugs and love, my friend. And I do.

[Maybenaut]

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

[Flatpoint High]

[Annrc]

[AndyinPA]

[Kriselda Gray]

Thanks guys - I could feel all those hugs