Drunk Capt. Karl and the imaginary AMFF

[Azastan]

Hmmm...there's three ways to get to the Atlantic from the Great Lakes. First way is via St. Lawrence Seaway. I'm not sure if he'd need a passport or not (I believe it does, which is of course obstacle #1) since there ARE stops in Canada on the way out. Also, going through locks is expensive.

The other two ways both require that masts be un-stepped at at least one point during the trip.

But I know that Kap'n Karl has planned and plotted all this already.

What's he going to do with the Behemoth, though? Is it being put on the market, for one of us to purchase?

[Luke]

Not sure Scir, that's how #FatRambo posted it. Of course, Karl is always so honest -- so it must be Ryan, right?

Azastan, Rusty, America's Squirrel seems pretty confident Karl won't go through the Great Lakes. Rusty's from WisconSIN.

Rusty, America's Squirrel
@RustyMerciful ·33m Replying to @scirreeve @Orly_licious and 2 others

He wouldn't dare to sail out of the Great Lakes. He'd have to go through Montreal and the RCMP will not put up with his sh!t

Scir also is sus, for good reason.

Scir Reeve @scirreeve 42m
Replying to @Orly_licious @RyanLankford and 2 others
Karl has a boat but last I knew it was docked on Lake Michigan. He is scared to go back to Wisconsin so we shall see what he does. Not sure he should take that boat from Lake Michigan to the Atlantic but whatever - he will never do that cuz he is drunk (and scared).

Rusty has taken to calling Karl's boat the SS FatRambo.

SS Fat Rambo.JPG (71.26 KiB) Viewed 1371 times

SS FatRambo.JPG (69.77 KiB) Viewed 1371 times

By the way, today is #SquirrelAppreciationDay, lots of Twitter posts about it. This is far more interesting than Karl:

Backyard Squirrel Maze 2.0- The Walnut Heist
52,987,236 viewsMay 18, 2021

[Estiveo]

He just needs to get the op-vec maritime conversion kit.

Estiveoshot_20220121_195704.jpg

[pipistrelle]

A boat suited to a lake is not necessarily seaworthy.

[Azastan]

He just needs to get the op-vec maritime conversion kit.

You know, recommendations for the voyage do call for a draft of 5 feet or less, but your illustration is of a much lesser vehicle than the Behemoth.

Back to plotting the trip:

Since we know that Kap'n Karl is deathly afraid to be spotted in Wisconsin, that means he will be going by way of the Erie Canal or via the Mississippi. Not sure that he'd want to go through the Erie Canal, since that route takes him through New York City.

However, the biggest obstacle in regard to the planned escape to sea, is that it is highly unlikely that a ship both large enough for the minimum requirements to be seaworthy, and yet small enough for 1 or 2 people to handle at sea, is going to have the capacity to hold enough alcohol which will be consumed during the 1-2 years planned to be at sea.

[Sam the Centipede]

We know that the Assmada will never happen, not one boat will set sail for an extended stay in the Atlantic Ocean.

But it is still amusing to imagine a boat departing with the Kraptain and a Krew of Kronies.

How long could such a bunch survive? They'd barely be out of harbor before Karl started ordering people to do pointless and stupid things, expecting others to cook and clean while he kommanded.

Then there would be arguments about sleeping arrangements (guess who'd need the big kabin?) and watch keeping.

How would they occupy themselves during those long hours at sea? Listening to Karl's lectures on Coats of Many Colors?

They wouldn't survive two nights before a majority of the krew saw a glimmer of sense and initiated a plan to return.

Another notable omission in Karl's fantasy is his failure to consider another player, whatever shadowy and ruthless group he imagines created the Vaxtermination program – wouldn't they prove a tricky adversary to a few elderly seasick nutters?

And, of course, the entire Rest of the World!

The narrative arc needs more development before it can become a tv miniseries!

[Azastan]

Umm, the whole plan is based on a majority of US population dying from the vaccine.

The plan to take over the United States and restore blah blah blah blah blah 10th Amendment blah blah blah blah blah blah blah is based on everyone dying from the vaccine, but the plan to head to the sea in ships is firmly based on craziness in Kapn' Karl's feverish mind.

Our assumption is that it won't take place, based on past performance, but ya never know, as there may be one or two nutters out there who might fancy being in close quarters with Kap'n Karl for a couple of years.

Right now all we know is that he 'plans' (using that word loosely, mind you) on leaving from the Great Lakes to head to the Atlantic. If I were at all interested in joining his 'armada' (again using that word loosely, and bearing in mind that the last great Armada whimpered all the way back to Spain), I'd want to know a few more details--how much food, water, clothing will be necessary? Have any of the people involved ever done any sailing? Any of them do LONG TERM sailing? Do those people know how to do anything besides shoot guns and blow shofars? Does anyone actually have a boat?

[pipistrelle]

They don’t know how to shoot guns or blow shofars.

SUNSCREEN, BABY.

[johnpcapitalist]

Hey now, #FatRambo is serious abut the AMFF Armada! Karl has it all worked out.

AMERICAN MILITIA FREEDOM FORCES, [1/14/2022 11:22 PM]
I suggest letting God smite all Conservatives, Liberals, Commies, Republicans, Democrats and "LET'S GO BRANDON!" And, takeover when almost all Americans are dead as a doornail. When no one is left alive, we take over DC.

That is what the AMFF ARMADA is for. We launch in Spring. All other Americans will die from transmission by shedding of The Vaxtermination. The ARMADA will be safe at Sea.

We stay in the Atlantic for 1-2 years. And, when all the Vaxterminated have died, that is when we land to restore our "republican form of government" where in pursuance of Tenth Amendment LAW and ORDER The Republicans, Democrats and Presidents have no authority to vote on or spend money on anything. By Constitutional Law and Order those Powers and SPENDING are "reserved to the States respectively, or to the people."

Most of the time at Sea will be very pleasurable and enjoyable. We shall endeavor to make it so.

Dang, that lets us out. Bye Karl

I wonder if Karl has ever thought about how much food you'd have to carry in order to survive for 1-2 years at sea without making landfall. People generally need to eat between 3-5 pounds of food daily. So 2 years' worth of food would be 3,600 pounds of raw food, and we can estimate double that for packaging. In other words, 3 1/2 tons of food per person for 2 years. That doesn't, of course, account for all the booze that Karl would require in order to survive a voyage of that duration. Figure another 3 1/2 tons at least, depending on whether he's a beer man or a liquor man.

Of course, refrigeration and freezing takes fuel, so the best way to carry that much food would be via dry MRE's, or some of that powdered survival crap that Jim Bakker sells. Not exactly cruise line cuisine. Put four people on a bass fishing boat (the kind of boat poots in the Midwest are most likely to own) in the North Atlantic in a winter storm with 15 tons of food and you'll last for a matter of minutes before capsizing.

Oh, and there's the small matter of potable water. A gallon a day is another 10 pounds per person, the same as the food. You would be better off making water, which again takes fuel.

By comparison: I know from hearing from someone that's been on Ohio-class nuclear subs that food storage is a major issue for a three-month cruise segment. The boat is almost 600 feet long and 40 feet wide. To feed a crew of 150, they store the food on the passageway floors and put masonite boards over the top of the cans. You spend the first month or two of the cruise hunched over because you're constantly walking on top of two feet of canned goods. In fact, the main limitation on how long they can stay submerged is how much food they can store.

Maybe Karl is fantasizing about cruise ship-like accommodations. But cruise ships are designed to pack in as many passengers as possible, and to do that they minimize food storage space. They have to refuel and re-provision weekly. There's simply not enough room to store two years' food for 1,000+ passengers and crew, much less the fuel to noodle around for two years. And of course if you loaded 3 1/2 tons of food for each passenger into their staterooms, the ship would become top heavy and would capsize in the tiniest of waves.

I notice that Karl hasn't actually made any concrete suggestions about where they're going to get the boats.

[pipistrelle]

Hmmm...there's three ways to get to the Atlantic from the Great Lakes. First way is via St. Lawrence Seaway. I'm not sure if he'd need a passport or not (I believe it does, which is of course obstacle #1) since there ARE stops in Canada on the way out. Also, going through locks is expensive.

The other two ways both require that masts be un-stepped at at least one point during the trip.

But I know that Kap'n Karl has planned and plotted all this already.

What's he going to do with the Behemoth, though? Is it being put on the market, for one of us to purchase?

Canada makes it very hard to get in for anyone who’s had a DUI. Has Kap’n had a DUI?

[TheNewSaint]

All other Americans will die from transmission by shedding of The Vaxtermination. The AMFF ARMADA will be safe at Sea. We stay in the Atlantic for 1-2 years.

Given those choices, I'd rather die from vaxtermination.

[Azastan]

Canada makes it very hard to get in for anyone who’s had a DUI. Has Kap’n had a DUI?

I don't know about a DUI, but one of my neighbours is a Canadian citizen, and in order to visit her father in British Columbia, she had to be vaccinated. No vaccination, no entry.

[Sam the Centipede]

Do I detect the smallest hint of a trace of slight skepticism here?

I was wondering why Karl is pushing this idiotic scheme. I thought maybe he fancied being a Fleet Kommander but I don't think it's that. He hasn't boasted what a brilliant Constitutional Admiral he'd be! I speculate that it's the idea of international waters that draws Karl in. He imagines being outside the law and – more importantly – out of reach of law enforcement, a heaven for him.

Otherwise surely the obvious option would be to propose a land-based commune in a remote area, where these heroes can fence themselves off into a self-contained nuttery.on land they (imagine they) can work, growing fresh veg, hunting game, chopping trees for building and firewood, and so on. Lots of productive manly activities, much better than just sitting on a boat staring blankly at the horizon. Of course those isolationist communities are passé, but it's still a thousand times more sane and practical that the Armadildo.

And Sporky has previously proposed similar ventures so he could join in too, what a dream team for an edoocashun program!

[scirreeve]

Hmmm...there's three ways to get to the Atlantic from the Great Lakes. First way is via St. Lawrence Seaway. I'm not sure if he'd need a passport or not (I believe it does, which is of course obstacle #1) since there ARE stops in Canada on the way out. Also, going through locks is expensive.

The other two ways both require that masts be un-stepped at at least one point during the trip.

But I know that Kap'n Karl has planned and plotted all this already.

What's he going to do with the Behemoth, though? Is it being put on the market, for one of us to purchase?

Canada makes it very hard to get in for anyone who’s had a DUI. Has Kap’n had a DUI?

Several of course. That is why he doesn't have a driver's license.

[pipistrelle]

Hmmm...there's three ways to get to the Atlantic from the Great Lakes. First way is via St. Lawrence Seaway. I'm not sure if he'd need a passport or not (I believe it does, which is of course obstacle #1) since there ARE stops in Canada on the way out. Also, going through locks is expensive.

The other two ways both require that masts be un-stepped at at least one point during the trip.

But I know that Kap'n Karl has planned and plotted all this already.

What's he going to do with the Behemoth, though? Is it being put on the market, for one of us to purchase?

Canada makes it very hard to get in for anyone who’s had a DUI. Has Kap’n had a DUI?

Several of course. That is why he doesn't have a driver's license.

You need to convince them you’re rehabilitated and unlikely to offend again. Good luck with that, Kap’n. (I’m assuming he’s been convicted vs. just accused.)

Entering Canada with a DUI offense

Canada may or may not allow persons with DUI (driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol) convictions to enter their country. Depending on the crime, and how long ago it was committed, and how you have behaved since the conviction, you may still be allowed to come to Canada if you:
convince an Canadian immigration officer that you meet the legal terms to be deemed rehabilitated, or
applied for rehabilitation and were approved, or
were granted a record suspension, or
have a temporary resident permit.
For more information, visit CBSA’s Overcome criminal convictions page.

Travelers who require in-depth information regarding the process of applying for a waiver or other admissibility questions can reach the Canada Border Services Agency (CBSA) during regular business hours, Monday through Friday (8:00 am to 4:00 pm except federal statutory holidays), by calling either (506) 636-5064 or (204) 983-3500.

For more information, visit the CBSA home page: http://cbsa-asfc.gc.ca/menu-eng.html and contact page: http://cbsa-asfc.gc.ca/contact/bis-sif-eng.html. Information for non-Canadians, visit http://cbsa-asfc.gc.ca/noncan-eng.html

[Azastan]

Several of course. That is why he doesn't have a driver's license.

He also needs to have registered his boat. So if he's leaving from the Great Lakes because he has a boat there, it's probably because the registration is about to run out on his boat (apparently registration runs for 3 years in Wisconsin) and he needs to move it before he needs to shell out the money.

I stumbled across some interesting discussion about the fines received for boats without their registration numbers. This could be severely out of date, but apparently Canada is quite fierce about revenue generation and will write up tickets at the drop of a RCMP hat, and the state of New York is also quite keen on helping their revenue stream, so it sounds as if Kap'n Karl's options for beating his feet out of Wisconsin are getting fewer and fewer. Check out the answer regarding equipment required to be on board the vessel!

https://forums.iboats.com/threads/fine- ... at.151840/

You need to convince them you’re rehabilitated and unlikely to offend again. Good luck with that, Kap’n. (I’m assuming he’s been convicted vs. just accused.)

He can't get past the part of needing to be vaccinated, though. My husband went to Canada about two months ago, and it's not a fun process.

[scirreeve]

Hmmm...there's three ways to get to the Atlantic from the Great Lakes. First way is via St. Lawrence Seaway. I'm not sure if he'd need a passport or not (I believe it does, which is of course obstacle #1) since there ARE stops in Canada on the way out. Also, going through locks is expensive.

The other two ways both require that masts be un-stepped at at least one point during the trip.

But I know that Kap'n Karl has planned and plotted all this already.

What's he going to do with the Behemoth, though? Is it being put on the market, for one of us to purchase?

Canada makes it very hard to get in for anyone who’s had a DUI. Has Kap’n had a DUI?

Several of course. That is why he doesn't have a driver's license.

Here is one of them (his first?). BAC noted in the court record. Low bar for drunk Karl. There are more I think.

Capture.JPG (58.49 KiB) Viewed 1200 times

[Arthurwankspittle]

If this ever happens I imagine Rusty the squirrel and his mates sneaking on board and eating all the provisions.

[Foggy]

In NC, you don't have to register your boat if it's less than 4.25 meters (14 feet) long.

If you want to know how to survive forever while lost at sea, may I recommend Life of Pi?

[northland10]

If he actually got out on the boat, which he won't, he'd be whining for the coast guard not long after passing the Big Mac.

[Azastan]

In NC, you don't have to register your boat if it's less than 4.25 meters (14 feet) long.

If you want to know how to survive forever while lost at sea, may I recommend Life of Pi?

REGISTRATION REQUIRED
What is required to be registered in Wisconsin:

All motorized vessels and boats used on waters of the state; including electric trolling motors.
Sailboats greater than 12 feet in length used on waters of the state.
REGISTRATION NOT REQUIRED
What is not required to be registered in Wisconsin:

Nonmotorized boats (non-sailboats).
Nonmotorized sailboats 12 feet in length or less.
Boats registered in another state and using Wisconsin waters for less than 60 consecutive days.
Boats operated under the authority of a temporary operating receipt, no greater than 60 days from the date of application and payment. The temporary operating receipt must be carried onboard.
Boats from a country other than the United States temporarily using the waters of the state.
A military or public boat of the United States, except recreational-type public vessels.
A boat whose owner is a state or subdivision of a state, which is used principally for governmental purposes, and which is clearly identifiable.
A ships lifeboat.
Boats present in this state, for a period of not to exceed 10 days, for the express purpose of competing in a race conducted under a permit from a municipality or an authorized agency of the U.S. government.
“Waters of this state" means any waters within the territorial limits of this state, including the Wisconsin portion of boundary waters.

“Boat" or “vessel" means every description of watercraft (i.e. motorboat, sailboat, jet ski, pontoon, canoe, kayak etc.) used or capable of being used as a means of transportation on water, except a seaplane on the water and a fishing raft.

I think Kap'n Karl is just using this as a dodge to try to get out of paying to register his boat.

WISCONSIN BOAT REGISTRATION TERM
The Wisconsin boat registration period runs for 3 years. The registration period begins on April 1 of the year in which the registration is issued or renewed and expires on March 31 of the 3rd year after issuance or renewal.

[TheNewSaint]

If he actually got out on the boat, which he won't, he'd be whining for the coast guard not long after passing the Big Mac.

They wouldn't need the Coast Guard, they'd need CSI. Karl's already said he intends to hang anyone who doesn't Constitution correctly. Imagine how Fleet Admiral Karl would handle any questioning of his authority. Imagine how quickly Karl will do something stupid that rightly needs to be questioned. Imagine the social dynamics that would take effect in a fleet of boats full of people who think all society has ended. And have conditioned themselves to that idea, because they've already stolen someone else's boat and supplies to be there. Who were all stupid, selfish, short-sighted, disagreeable people to begin with. Karl Koenigs' Libertalia would surpass Jonestown as the most self-destructive colony in modern human history.

[Foggy]

Yeah, yeah, imagine this, imagine that.

I can't even imagine him holding down the lunch he just drank before getting on a boat.

Hay, this thing is wobbly! I'm feeling a little

[pipistrelle]

If he actually got out on the boat, which he won't, he'd be whining for the coast guard not long after passing the Big Mac.

They wouldn't need the Coast Guard, they'd need CSI. Karl's already said he intends to hang anyone who doesn't Constitution correctly. Imagine how Fleet Admiral Karl would handle any questioning of his authority. Imagine how quickly Karl will do something stupid that rightly needs to be questioned. Imagine the social dynamics that would take effect in a fleet of boats full of people who think all society has ended. And have conditioned themselves to that idea, because they've already stolen someone else's boat and supplies to be there. Who were all stupid, selfish, short-sighted, disagreeable people to begin with. Karl Koenigs' Libertalia would surpass Jonestown as the most self-destructive colony in modern human history.

These would all be good points if there were an AMFF and if Kap'n actually had any followers. However, his charm school personality seems off putting even to sympathizers with his views (as convoluted as they are).

What I want to know is why he's not in prison for breaking the fingers of an FBI operative. I mean, that seems like it's a serious crime.

[TheNewSaint]

These would all be good points if there were an AMFF and if Kap'n actually had any followers. However, his charm school personality seems off putting even to sympathizers with his views (as convoluted as they are).

That's Karl's real logistical problem. Never mind the boats and supplies. There isn't a single person that will do anything he demands. Even his family and Brand Thornton seem to be distancing themselves.