Weird Headlines

[Gupwalla]

CFO arrested for public intoxication after falling asleep inside stranger’s house

the whole story https://www.marketwatch.com/story/tyson ... 1667848499

John Tyson, the - I am guessing - under-30 years old CFO of Tyson Foods. The chicken people. [Edit - if I had read more closely I’d know he was 32.]

If you are looking at the name and wondering whether there is some nepotism involved, the answer is yes. There are presumably people with a bit more seasoning and a bit less sauce who could serve as CFO, but none of them are sons of the company’s Chairman. Feudalism is alive and well in the Poultry Empire.

[Gregg]

Dude, I work at Ford, and honestly, in 2008 it was only nepotism and overweighted B Stock that saved this company.

Aside from Bill, there are a whole lot of people with their name on the building and all the ones I know actually do a good job. I guess the ones who don't want to work hard have no need to, but Henry's descendants seem to have inherited his work ethic, and also dropped the antisemitism the old man was pretty famous for.

It can be a good thing.

[Dave from down under]

Zebra finch builds nest in 'outrageous' place

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-11-08/ ... /101627980

[sugar magnolia]

Authorities: Dog found carrying human arm in Jackson; head still missing

https://www.wlbt.com/2022/11/07/authori ... l-missing/

[MsDaisy]

Authorities: Dog found carrying human arm in Jackson; head still missing

[RTH10260]

Better not think of a dog bringing home a missing head

[Mrich]

I have a friend who cut his hand off with a radial arm saw. He was home, alone, at his lake house. I'm sure he was in some kind of shock, but he made a tourniquet out of duct tape, put his hand in a bag of ice, and drove himself to the hospital. When he got there, they asked if he had the hand; he said "it's in the car." Except it wasn't.

They sent some deputies out to look for it but they didn't find it. (The doctors told him they probably couldn't reattach it anyway.) He thinks he must have driven off with the bag on top of the car. I always imagine some dog owner asking his pet "whatcha got there, boy?" and having the fright of a lifetime.

As far as I know the hand was never found....

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

That reads like a great Halloween story for kids. "And the hand was NEVER found..." Then have another adult grab a kid.

[Flatpoint High]

4szcu8n9puy91.jpg (88.72 KiB) Viewed 1269 times

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

[pipistrelle]

"Randy"?

Edit: That was a real story from 2014.

https://www.itv.com/news/2014-06-06/gui ... -enclosure

[RVInit]

That’s quite a big smile on that little guys face.

[Uninformed]

“KFC apologises after German Kristallnacht promotion”:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-63499057

“KFC has apologised after sending a promotional message to customers in Germany, urging them to commemorate Kristallnacht with cheesy chicken.”

[pipistrelle]

“KFC apologises after German Kristallnacht promotion”:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-63499057

“KFC has apologised after sending a promotional message to customers in Germany, urging them to commemorate Kristallnacht with cheesy chicken.”

Yeah, this is why it’s stupid to replace humans with bots. And bots don’t buy chicken.

[Azastan]

That’s quite a big smile on that little guys face.

Guinea pigs always have a 'smile', but somewhere along the way, this piggy got flattened out which exaggerated his 'smile'.

[Phoenix520]

What a night he had! Guinea pigs are prolific little fuckers, it’s wise to keep the sexes separated.

A roommate was dating a pet store owner. He moved in. They put a couple of Guinea pigs ( his best sellers) in the basement and within a couple of months there were soooo many. He moved out. We found Guinea pigs for days afterwards hiding in the laundry.

[pipistrelle]

That’s quite a big smile on that little guys face.

Guinea pigs always have a 'smile', but somewhere along the way, this piggy got flattened out which exaggerated his 'smile'.

That’s not Randy, however. His photo is in the article from 2014. https://thefogbow.com/forum/viewtopic.p ... 42#p149536

[Azastan]

That’s not Randy, however. His photo is in the article from 2014. https://thefogbow.com/forum/viewtopic.p ... 42#p149536

?

I was refering to the photo shown.

[Volkonski]

PIGS IS PIGS

https://www.commonlit.org/en/texts/pigs-is-pigs

[humblescribe]

Perhaps not the most genteel topic to hit the news of late:

https://www.theguardian.com/australia-n ... al-matters

But the jokes just write themselves with this particular news item.

[Dave from down under]

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-11-14/ ... /101649744

Rats bop to the beat of music including Lady Gaga and Queen like humans, study says

<with video>

Can you move to the beat?

Key points:
Moving to a musical beat was thought to be a skill innately unique to humans, but research shows rats also have this ability
In the study, 10 rats were fitted with wireless accelerometers to measure the slightest head movements
Rats displayed innate beat synchronisation, scientists found
Scientists have discovered rats can — an ability previously thought to be uniquely human.

[rossgw]

Zebra finch builds nest in 'outrageous' place

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-11-08/ ... /101627980

Actually, we do not want this to get out, but the finch probably killed the dingo and slung it up their. They are killers, even the drop bears are scared of them.

[Dave from down under]

True

So true…

There was this group of hikers… messy…

[Sam the Centipede]

Fun factlet: songbirds (those birds with musical songs, not screeches, cawing, booming, honking etc.) originated in Australia about 24 million years ago, and then Island-hopped and diversified around the world.

Nellie Melba, Kylie Minogue, Iggy Azalea (and many others) all followed a trend established by their feathered compatriots long ago.

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

Zebra finch...