Spring forward.
To delete this message, click the X at top right.

Florida Man

User avatar
northland10
Posts: 5598
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 6:47 pm
Location: Northeast Illinois
Occupation: Organist/Choir Director/Fundraising Data Analyst
Verified: ✅ I'm me.

Re: Florida Man

#201

Post by northland10 »

Key in the ignition and turn? What's a key? How would you put it into an "ignition"?
101010 :towel:
User avatar
Gregg
Posts: 5502
Joined: Tue Feb 23, 2021 1:54 am
Location: Cincinnati, Gettysburg
Occupation: We build cars

Re: Florida Man

#202

Post by Gregg »

tek wrote: Fri May 06, 2022 4:34 pm Two years ago daughter.tek was down here in FL doing the horse thing.. She has a Golf type-R, stick shift.

One of the trainers was having a fancy end-of-the-season party at some fancy place in Broward county.

None of the valet parking jockeys could drive a stick.
The manager of the valet parking couldn't drive a stick.

She asked "But don't you have people in their porsches and ferraris here all the time?"
Manager: "A lot of them are automatics, autosticks, or paddles. And the really rich people have someone trailing in one of their other vehicles to park the car."

Different world.
The only peasants who can park my car are my own in house peasants. :fingerwag:
Supreme Commander, Imperial Illuminati Air Force
:dog:

You don't have to consent, but I'm gonna tase you anyway.
User avatar
neonzx
Posts: 6120
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 11:01 am
Location: FloriDUH Hell
Verified: 🤩✅✅✅✅✅🤩

Re: Florida Man

#203

Post by neonzx »

Wow, I guess I lived a charmed youth. I learned to drive on a manual transmission. Was a little hairy at first having to stop on an upgrade/hill for a light and then proceed, but became second nature. Kids today... *smh*
User avatar
tek
Posts: 2250
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 10:15 am

Re: Florida Man

#204

Post by tek »

By the time daughter.tek was old enough to drive, we didn't have any stickshift cars...

So I borrowed my brother's truck a few times to give her some experience.

She was still kinda dicey with it though, until a few years ago she said "screw this, I'm gonna force myself to learn." She leased a stickshift Jetta (for crazy cheap, because nobody wants a stickshift) and that was that.

When she went to buy the Golf-R, the salesperson couldn't get the car out of it's parking space to bring it around.

a standard transmission is a great anti-theft device.
User avatar
bill_g
Posts: 5342
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 5:52 pm
Location: Portland OR
Occupation: Retired (kind of)
Verified: ✅ Checked Republic ✓ ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

Re: Florida Man

#205

Post by bill_g »

raison de arizona wrote: Thu May 05, 2022 3:22 pm
Gregg wrote: Thu May 05, 2022 3:19 pm A little part of me died when I read that. :oops:
Yes, I completely glossed over the 2006 Ford GT Heritage Edition aspect. I mean... What an idiot. That's what I mean.
Clearly a case of where a guy's dick is bigger than his brain. Or at least he thinks it is.

Restated, an clear example of FlawDuh Man.
User avatar
Tiredretiredlawyer
Posts: 7541
Joined: Tue Feb 23, 2021 10:07 pm
Location: Rescue Pets Land
Occupation: 21st Century Suffragist
Verified: ✅🐴🐎🦄🌻5000 posts and counting

Re: Florida Man

#206

Post by Tiredretiredlawyer »

My parents insisted all of their kids learned to drive a stick. Perchance it was because of Dad's penchant for buying sports cars as the "family car". :biggrin:
"Mickey Mouse and I grew up together." - Ruthie Tompson, Disney animation checker and scene planner and one of the first women to become a member of the International Photographers Union in 1952.
User avatar
northland10
Posts: 5598
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 6:47 pm
Location: Northeast Illinois
Occupation: Organist/Choir Director/Fundraising Data Analyst
Verified: ✅ I'm me.

Re: Florida Man

#207

Post by northland10 »

I still get mad at people who stop really close behind me on a hill.
101010 :towel:
User avatar
AndyinPA
Posts: 9856
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 10:42 am
Location: Pittsburgh
Verified:

Re: Florida Man

#208

Post by AndyinPA »

My husband insisted I had to learn to drive a stick. I got used to it. If I lived where it was flat, I think I might prefer it, but here where it's so hilly, nope! I would plan my route to avoid really steep hills, but that wasn't always possible and became a pain in the butt.
"Choose your leaders with wisdom and forethought. To be led by a coward is to be controlled by all that the coward fears… To be led by a liar is to ask to be told lies." -Octavia E. Butler
User avatar
Slim Cognito
Posts: 6555
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 9:15 am
Location: Too close to trump
Occupation: Hats. I do hats.
Verified:

Re: Florida Man

#209

Post by Slim Cognito »

I’ve driven sticks since my 70s Dodge Omni. I always thought it was fun. I was supposed to help next-door neighbor learn to drive her vintage volkswagon. But then she lost her freaking mind over Trump and that fell through. Her husband is disappointed. Now he hast to teach her.

But I’m a big believer in “just get in and drive” school.
Pup Dennis in training to be a guide dog & given to a deserving vet. Thx! ImageImageImage x4
User avatar
sugar magnolia
Posts: 3228
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 12:54 pm

Re: Florida Man

#210

Post by sugar magnolia »

Slim Cognito wrote: Sat May 07, 2022 12:45 pm
But I’m a big believer in “just get in and drive” school.
My grandmother bought us all cars when we were in high school. Small Delta town with one dealership and no used car lots, so she took us to the next big town over that had one. I picked out the cutest little Toyota Celica, teal blue with a white landau top, my grandmother paid for it then took off for home. I got in and realized it was a stick. And we were in a parking lot with a 45 degree exit directly onto the 6 lane highway. I made it home knowing how to drive a stick but it took me much longer than the 30 minutes it should have.
jcolvin2
Posts: 704
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 11:56 am
Verified:

Re: Florida Man

#211

Post by jcolvin2 »

I learned to drive a stick by driving a truck on a ranch located in a high desert valley in Eastern California (where I spent a summer when I was seventeen). I did not have a stick car of my own until I was in my late 20s and my wife fell in love with a Mazda Miata. Knowing how to drive a stick has come in useful in renting cars in Europe, where automatic transmissions are not common.
User avatar
Gregg
Posts: 5502
Joined: Tue Feb 23, 2021 1:54 am
Location: Cincinnati, Gettysburg
Occupation: We build cars

Re: Florida Man

#212

Post by Gregg »

I learned to drive in a 1963 Ford Falcon with a 3 speed column shift. I also learned that when you stop at a light, you stop far enough back that you can see where the tires of the car in front of you meet the road, and that when a car comes the other direction at night you avert your glance to the edge lines. There are so many things that are technical skills of driving that aren't taught anymore and kids don't know stuff that I think is second nature.
Supreme Commander, Imperial Illuminati Air Force
:dog:

You don't have to consent, but I'm gonna tase you anyway.
User avatar
Ben-Prime
Posts: 2599
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 11:29 pm
Location: Worldwide Availability
Occupation: Managing People Who Manage Machines
Verified: ✅MamaSaysI'mBonaFide

Re: Florida Man

#213

Post by Ben-Prime »

tek wrote: Sat May 07, 2022 9:01 am By the time daughter.tek was old enough to drive, we didn't have any stickshift cars...

So I borrowed my brother's truck a few times to give her some experience.

She was still kinda dicey with it though, until a few years ago she said "screw this, I'm gonna force myself to learn." She leased a stickshift Jetta (for crazy cheap, because nobody wants a stickshift) and that was that.

When she went to buy the Golf-R, the salesperson couldn't get the car out of it's parking space to bring it around.

a standard transmission is a great anti-theft device.
When I finally had the opportunity to learn to drive a stick, it was in Dhaka, Bangladesh, which has rarely enforced traffic standards and only two stop lights in the city. And this was a 20 year old Toyota Landcruiser larger than my apartment bathroom. I decided not to risk it and hired a driver.
But the sunshine aye shall light the sky,
As round and round we run;
And the truth shall ever come uppermost,
And justice shall be done.

- Charles Mackay, "Eternal Justice"
User avatar
sugar magnolia
Posts: 3228
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 12:54 pm

Re: Florida Man

#214

Post by sugar magnolia »

Gregg wrote: Sun May 08, 2022 1:22 am I learned to drive in a 1963 Ford Falcon with a 3 speed column shift. I also learned that when you stop at a light, you stop far enough back that you can see where the tires of the car in front of you meet the road, and that when a car comes the other direction at night you avert your glance to the edge lines. There are so many things that are technical skills of driving that aren't taught anymore and kids don't know stuff that I think is second nature.
Three on the tree!

Don't pass in an intersection, come to a complete stop before turning right on red, stay your ass in the right lane on the highway unless you're passing someone, pull the fuck to the right for emergency vehicles, pull to the side and stop for funeral processions, and never, ever use turn signals if you live in the South.
User avatar
Gregg
Posts: 5502
Joined: Tue Feb 23, 2021 1:54 am
Location: Cincinnati, Gettysburg
Occupation: We build cars

Re: Florida Man

#215

Post by Gregg »

I have also noticed in Florida and for some reason Kansas City, a lot of people go down the ramp to get on the expressway,...

and stop and the end of the ramp. :cantlook:

There are times I really miss the "guns" toggle on the cyclic...
Supreme Commander, Imperial Illuminati Air Force
:dog:

You don't have to consent, but I'm gonna tase you anyway.
User avatar
sugar magnolia
Posts: 3228
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 12:54 pm

Re: Florida Man

#216

Post by sugar magnolia »

Gregg wrote: Sun May 08, 2022 4:46 am I have also noticed in Florida and for some reason Kansas City, a lot of people go down the ramp to get on the expressway,...

and stop and the end of the ramp. :cantlook:

There are times I really miss the "guns" toggle on the cyclic...
Yep. My husband rear ended a woman the other day who came to a dead stop at a turn with a designated lane. Her husband and the cop explained to her about NOT STOPPING when you have a designated lane.

And my all-time pet peeve is when there is an entrance/exit ramp and the fuckwits going highway speed get in front of the vehicle entering and then slam on the brakes to make the exit. At the exact same time the poor guy entering is speeding up and trying to merge. I guess getting in front of someone is more important than traffic safety.
User avatar
tek
Posts: 2250
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 10:15 am

Re: Florida Man

#217

Post by tek »

My next story was in PA and not FL, so I dropped it in the Hijack thread...
User avatar
jez
Posts: 470
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 10:20 am
Location: Midwestish
Occupation: Thread Killer
Verified: ✅ Medicated

Re: Florida Man

#218

Post by jez »

Off Topic
sugar magnolia wrote: Sun May 08, 2022 4:36 am
Gregg wrote: Sun May 08, 2022 1:22 am I learned to drive in a 1963 Ford Falcon with a 3 speed column shift. I also learned that when you stop at a light, you stop far enough back that you can see where the tires of the car in front of you meet the road, and that when a car comes the other direction at night you avert your glance to the edge lines. There are so many things that are technical skills of driving that aren't taught anymore and kids don't know stuff that I think is second nature.
Three on the tree!

Don't pass in an intersection, come to a complete stop before turning right on red, stay your ass in the right lane on the highway unless you're passing someone, pull the fuck to the right for emergency vehicles, pull to the side and stop for funeral processions, and never, ever use turn signals if you live in the South.
I learned on a 64 Bel Aire 4-door with the "Three on the tree". It was a freaking tank. The front bench seat didn't adjust (grandpa had welded into place when it had broken years before) so couldn't move the seat forward. Grandpa was 6'3"ish. I was about 5 foot nothing at the time. Sat on the very edge of the seat and stretched my legs as much as possible. Dad rigged a small block for the clutch so I could push it all the way in. Had to double clutch first to get it going.

Did I mention that I was short? Look THROUGH the huge ass steering wheel and all I needed was the white hair in a bun and wearing a shawl. If you could have seen me from behind. It didn't really look like anyone was driving, honestly. :faint:

Ahhhh... those were the days. :rotflmao: :dance:
“What is better ? to be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort ?”

~Paarthurnax
User avatar
roadscholar
Posts: 733
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 11:17 am
Location: Baltimore
Occupation: Renaissance Mechanic
Contact:

Re: Florida Man

#219

Post by roadscholar »

Gregg wrote: Sun May 08, 2022 4:46 am :P :P
I have also noticed in Florida and for some reason Kansas City, a lot of people go down the ramp to get on the expressway,...

and stop and the end of the ramp. :cantlook:

There are times I really miss the "guns" toggle on the cyclic...
That happened to my brother and the lady stopped so long he hopped out and walked up to her window and shouted “The sign said ‘yield,’ not ‘give up!’” :P
The bitterest truth is more wholesome than the sweetest lie.
User avatar
bill_g
Posts: 5342
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 5:52 pm
Location: Portland OR
Occupation: Retired (kind of)
Verified: ✅ Checked Republic ✓ ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

Re: Florida Man

#220

Post by bill_g »

I taught all our boys how to drive in one day in my old F150 (with long throw stick shift) on a logging road starting in Carlton OR that led (eventually) to Hwy 101 on the coast. Then they drove us home on paved roads with a lunch stop in Tillamook. By the time we got back they were experts.

I found the Nestucca River Rd years before when an avalanche closed OR6 / Wilson River Hwy near University Falls for a couple years. Spring rains caused a mountain side to sheer off taking the road with it. It took a while to reconnect, and it forced all traffic far north or far south. I looked for more direct routes, and found this other pass. It's a fun road that gets you over the Coast Range, but like all forestry roads, it follows the prevailing terrain. It's unimproved. It's winding. It goes up. It goes down. It goes back up again. You go left, you go right, you go left, you go straight, and then you make a hairpin to the left, and then the right. Rinse, repeat. Too far to the right puts you in a ditch or mountainside. Too far left sends you tumbling downhill, or at least into the trees below. Either way, it's a long walk home.

I drove us to Carlton, hung a hand scrawled STUDENT DRIVER sign off the tailgate, and let them take over. The first couple miles are paved, straight as a board, slightly downhill, with just one stop sign. That was a nice confidence builder. It gets them familiar with the knuckle buster shifter, the weight of the clutch, the sloppiness of the steering, and the tight brakes. As soon as we start going uphill, the grade increases, the engine lugs, and the gentle curves start. So, they are immediately learning how to steer and shift at the same time.

Then the pavement ends, and the washboard clay begins. It's still greasy from the rain a couple days ago. The potholes are numerous. The truck bounces. The corners are absolutely blind. Death could be heading towards at any moment. What they used to think was fun as a kid driving with Dad is now terrifying as I lean into the seat and sip from my drink like we are watching a movie. The road is exhausting, but as we crest the peak, they have become really good. Now we get to go down where they learn all about gravity and braking.

Skipping forward (because obviously we survived and I'm writing this), we get to 101 where they get to make their first full stop in 25 miles or so. I let them take a potty break, get a drink, and then we head north to Tillamook 19 miles away to our destination restaurant and maybe the jerky and cheese factories. Then it's a ride home on OR6 up up up, and then down down down, at highways speeds, their hands putting dents in the steering wheel, and the throwout bearing begging for mercy. We arrive in time for dinner, and they melt into their beds easily that night.

Sometime in the next couple weeks they will learn the fine art of replacing the universal joints they ruined, and help get the clutch replaced.

The End.
User avatar
Tiredretiredlawyer
Posts: 7541
Joined: Tue Feb 23, 2021 10:07 pm
Location: Rescue Pets Land
Occupation: 21st Century Suffragist
Verified: ✅🐴🐎🦄🌻5000 posts and counting

Re: Florida Man

#221

Post by Tiredretiredlawyer »

Wow! What a lesson!!! Was it a long bed F150?
"Mickey Mouse and I grew up together." - Ruthie Tompson, Disney animation checker and scene planner and one of the first women to become a member of the International Photographers Union in 1952.
User avatar
bill_g
Posts: 5342
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 5:52 pm
Location: Portland OR
Occupation: Retired (kind of)
Verified: ✅ Checked Republic ✓ ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

Re: Florida Man

#222

Post by bill_g »

Absolutely. It could hold full sheets of plywood flat in the bed with the tailgate closed. Or a half dozen bales of straw. Or a couple yards of garden dirt. Or a quarter of the household belongings during a move. Great for getting work done. Not so great in commuter traffic which is why I eventually went to the smaller Ranger with an automatic, AC, cloth seats, etc etc. Just plush enough to be comfortable, but not too plush to get dirty.
jcolvin2
Posts: 704
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 11:56 am
Verified:

Re: Florida Man

#223

Post by jcolvin2 »

sugar magnolia wrote: Sun May 08, 2022 4:36 am Don't pass in an intersection, come to a complete stop before turning right on red, stay your ass in the right lane on the highway unless you're passing someone, pull the fuck to the right for emergency vehicles, pull to the side and stop for funeral processions, and never, ever use turn signals if you live in the South.
The turn signal thing has become pretty universal.
User avatar
Volkonski
Posts: 11592
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 11:06 am
Location: Texoma and North Fork of Long Island
Occupation: Retired mechanical engineer
Verified:

Re: Florida Man

#224

Post by Volkonski »


A new viral TikTok shows a woman on a plane incoherently ranting about free speech while hurling homophobic slurs and praising Elon Musk as she is kicked off the aircraft.

The incident occurred on a flight out of West Palm Beach airport in Florida. It's not clear what initially caused the woman to be booted from the plane, but the TikTok user who originally posted the footage claimed it was over racist and homophobic comments she made.

It showed the woman delivering an unhinged rant about masks, China and Elon Musk being "the king"—Elvis would like a word, ma'am—while hurling homophobic slurs and profanity at nearby passengers.

:snippity:

She then gloated about making the entire plane late before warning the United States was turning into China and mocking passengers for wearing masks.
“If everyone fought for their own convictions there would be no war.” ― Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace
User avatar
raison de arizona
Posts: 17655
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2021 10:21 am
Location: Nothing, Arizona
Occupation: bit twiddler
Verified: ✔️ he/him/his

Re: Florida Man

#225

Post by raison de arizona »


:roll:
“Remember, democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet that did not commit suicide.” —John Adams
Post Reply

Return to “U.S. Culture and Media”