Fogbow

SNL’s Pete Davidson Debuts His Creepy ‘Sex Pest’ Matt Gaetz
Marlow Stern Senior Entertainment Editor Published Apr. 04, 2021 12:05AM ET

Who will play Matt Gaetz? It was the question many a Saturday Night Live fan asked themselves this week. Would it be Alex Moffat, whose Joe Biden has been relatively MIA? Or perhaps “Weekend Update” co-anchor Colin Jost, who gives off strong frat boy energy? We soon got our answer. SNL opened its latest edition with Oops, You Did It Again, a Vegas-set talk show hosted by Chloe Fineman’s Britney Spears spotlighting “the social pariahs of the week,” and was last weaponized against Ted Cruz following his Cancun fiasco. After appearances by Chris Redd’s Lil Nas X and Kate McKinnon’s (hilarious) Pepe Le Pew, we were treated to Florida GOP Rep. Matt Gaetz, played by… Pete Davidson.

Referring to Gaetz as “a full-on sex pest,” Spears grilled the creepy congressman about his recent controversies. The New York Times reported that Gaetz is under investigation for allegedly being in league with an accused sex trafficker, having a sexual relationship with a 17-year-old girl, and possibly violating sex-trafficking laws by paying for her to travel across state lines. Furthermore, CNN reported that Gaetz is said to have showed nude photos of women he’d bragged about sleeping with to fellow lawmakers on the House floor.

“Giggity-giggity-goo!” Davidson’s Gaetz exclaimed, channeling Family Guy’s resident sexual predator Quagmire.

“You were dating a 17-year-old and brought her on trips across state lines?” asked Britney, adding, “Prostitutes say you took ecstasy and had sex with them in Florida hotel rooms? And your Republican colleagues in Congress say you showed them nude photos of women you were sleeping with?” “Which is not a crime… just… horrifying!” Gaetz replied. “That’s ridiculous. People are just targeting me because I defended Donald Trump!” (Gaetz was, strangely enough, the only representative in Congress to vote against a 2017 human trafficking bill.)

When Spears asked Gaetz, “What has Trump done in your defense?” the congressman, who spends nearly all his time kissing Trump’s ass on television (and being creepy toward his daughter), came up empty. “Giggity-squat!” Gaetz responded. As The Daily Beast’s Asawin Suebsaeng reported, Trump has been closely following the Gaetz scandal but his associates have been begging him to stay out of it—for now. As for the SNL cold open, Fineman’s Spears wrapped things up by saying of Gaetz: “Judge him by his face.” “Uh-oh,” uttered Davidson’s Gaetz.

SNL’s Colin Jost Brutally Mocks His Look-Alike Matt Gaetz
The “Weekend Update” co-anchor also took aim at the QAnon crowd for ignoring the Gaetz sex-trafficking allegations.
Marlow Stern Senior Entertainment Editor Published Apr. 04, 2021 12:41AM ET





Following a cold open that saw Pete Davidson debut his creepy, Quagmire-esque Matt Gaetz, Saturday Night Live’s “Weekend Update” continued the onslaught. “Representative Matt Gaetz, who looks like a caricature-artist drawing of me, is reportedly under investigation for an alleged sexual relationship with an underage girl—because Gaetz believes that only voters should have to show ID,” joked Colin Jost. “It’s also being reported that Gaetz may have paid for sex with women he met online. That story has since been confirmed by his whole vibe.”
***
Jost then addressed Gaetz’s incredibly strange (and unconvincing) statement on the allegations, delivered in the third person: “Matt Gaetz has never paid for sex… Matt Gaetz has never ever been on any such websites whatsoever… Matt Gaetz cherishes the relationships in his past and looks forward to marrying the love of his life.” To that, Jost released his own statement in response: “Colin Jost does not believe you… Colin Jost thinks you have been to alllll the websites… Colin Jost thinks you should hold off on sending out those wedding invites.”

Of course, the Trump-loving QAnon crowd—conspiracy theorists who believe that Trump, a good friend of Jeffrey Epstein’s, was somehow waging covert battle against an army of Democratic and Hollywood pedophile sex traffickers—has been remarkably silent concerning the Gaetz revelations. “Here’s the craziest part of this story to me: a sitting congressman is being accused of child trafficking and the QAnon people are suddenly like, ‘Nah, I need more evidence,’” cracked Jost. “That was your whole thing! I mean, come on! Matt Gaetz’s girlfriend, she was allegedly 17, the 17th letter in the alphabet is Q, it all adds up! What are you waiting for? The storm is finally here, and QAnon is like, ‘You can’t believe everything you read on the internet.’” If that weren’t enough, Gaetz was the only representative in Congress to vote against a 2017 human trafficking bill.

Sunrise wrote: ↑Sun Apr 04, 2021 12:19 am

SlimSloSlider wrote: ↑Sat Apr 03, 2021 9:52 am

fierceredpanda wrote: ↑Sat Apr 03, 2021 9:26 am
Also, regarding the alleged extortion/funding the Levinson rescue angle, I'm confused. Does Gaetz family even have $25 million to pay?

Dad made much much more than that when he sold his healthcare business in 2008.
A settlement for an undisclosed amount was subsequently made concerning allegations of Medicare fraud.
But yes, probably as much as $500 million.

Why does there always seem to be some sleazy connection between Florida politicians and Medicare fraud? The name Rick Scott immediately comes to mind.

tek wrote: ↑Sun Apr 04, 2021 5:52 am Wohl and Burkman in "a valiant effort to separate fact from fiction"

Irony is dead.

Chilidog wrote: ↑Sun Apr 04, 2021 12:21 pm Does anyone have a good link to the latest version of the Greenberg indictment?

Suranis wrote: ↑Fri Apr 02, 2021 3:31 pm I doubt Gaetz will resign. If he does, he is a nothing. A loser. He will be admitting fault. How dare lesser people force him out just for a bunch of fucking.

Chilidog wrote: ↑Sun Apr 04, 2021 12:21 pm Does anyone have a good link to the latest version of the Greenberg indictment?

Greenberg resigned as tax collector in June, after he was arrested at his home by federal agents. He now faces at least 33 federal charges, including previously revealed allegations that he stalked a political opponent, illegally used a state database to create fake IDs and sex-trafficked a minor.

Greenberg is currently in the Orange County Jail awaiting his trial, which is scheduled for mid-June, though it’s possible the new charges could lead to a delay.

He is scheduled to be arraigned on the new counts on April 9.

Washington scandal cycles are predictable, and sex is especially potent in politics. Let me first remind everyone that I am a representative in Congress, not a monk, and certainly not a criminal.

Nancy Pelosi once defended President Bill Clinton after he got an intern to fellate him in the Oval Office. But when it comes to the allegation that I, a grown man, paid for an adult girlfriend’s expenses? Well, consider that a bridge too far for the power-hungry hypocrites.

I want to be clear about something as we process the leaks and lies from the past week. To this point, there are exactly zero credible (or even non-credible) accusers willing to come forward by name and state on the public record that I behaved improperly toward them, in the manner by which Democratic Gov. Andrew Cuomo has ten accusers.

Instead, CNN, the New York Times, Politico, and others are just repeating false allegations about a congressman who loathes the swamp and fights both sides of it on a daily basis.

Volkonski wrote: ↑Mon Apr 05, 2021 1:14 pm Rep. Matt Gaetz: The swamp is out to drown me with false charges, but I'm not giving up
by Rep. Matt Gaetz

https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opin ... -giving-up

Washington scandal cycles are predictable, and sex is especially potent in politics. Let me first remind everyone that I am a representative in Congress, not a monk, and certainly not a criminal.

Nancy Pelosi once defended President Bill Clinton after he got an intern to fellate him in the Oval Office. But when it comes to the allegation that I, a grown man, paid for an adult girlfriend’s expenses? Well, consider that a bridge too far for the power-hungry hypocrites.

I want to be clear about something as we process the leaks and lies from the past week. To this point, there are exactly zero credible (or even non-credible) accusers willing to come forward by name and state on the public record that I behaved improperly toward them, in the manner by which Democratic Gov. Andrew Cuomo has ten accusers.

Instead, CNN, the New York Times, Politico, and others are just repeating false allegations about a congressman who loathes the swamp and fights both sides of it on a daily basis.

orlylicious wrote: ↑Sat Apr 03, 2021 8:24 pm Northland, yeah. No idea how the little racist birfer found me, but it only lasted about 5 tweets before the big BLOCK. Even better, it blocked me too also. What a POS. Looked at recent tweets and it's still saying Michelle Obama was a biological male. 92K+ tweets of lies and hate. Honestly, if ObligedFriend wasn't a friend of Foggy's, would have blocked it long ago.

MN-Skeptic wrote: ↑Mon Apr 05, 2021 1:28 pm

Volkonski wrote: ↑Mon Apr 05, 2021 1:14 pm Rep. Matt Gaetz: The swamp is out to drown me with false charges, but I'm not giving up
by Rep. Matt Gaetz

https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opin ... -giving-up

Washington scandal cycles are predictable, and sex is especially potent in politics. Let me first remind everyone that I am a representative in Congress, not a monk, and certainly not a criminal.

Nancy Pelosi once defended President Bill Clinton after he got an intern to fellate him in the Oval Office. But when it comes to the allegation that I, a grown man, paid for an adult girlfriend’s expenses? Well, consider that a bridge too far for the power-hungry hypocrites.

I want to be clear about something as we process the leaks and lies from the past week. To this point, there are exactly zero credible (or even non-credible) accusers willing to come forward by name and state on the public record that I behaved improperly toward them, in the manner by which Democratic Gov. Andrew Cuomo has ten accusers.

Instead, CNN, the New York Times, Politico, and others are just repeating false allegations about a congressman who loathes the swamp and fights both sides of it on a daily basis.

So he's basically following Trump's approach to allegations?

FiveAcres wrote: ↑Mon Apr 05, 2021 2:54 pm On the bright side, it must be incredibly frustrating for Gaetz that the former guy, as well as the former guy's spawn, haven't been publicly supporting him.

Patagoniagirl wrote: ↑Fri Apr 02, 2021 8:24 pm It appears to me that Daddy Gaetz was asked to fund a search for the missing ex-CIA guy. This was prior to the Matt explosure. So they really had nothing to do with each other. But Matty perhaps thought it would be a good distraction from the shit show he knew was coming? Just my guess.