I want to know how your husband is doing and what he is doing, in case I ever need to do it.
I keep thinking, wow, if I feel helpless when it happens to Sugar M, think how I'd be if it happened to ol' Wifehorn. And I'd want to be the opposite of helpless. I'd want to fix EVERYTHING, that's how I roll. Except I know absolutely nothing, which might impinge slightly upon my healing talents.
So what does a husband do when he can't really do anything?
Foggy wrote: ↑Wed Oct 06, 2021 9:16 am
I want to know how your husband is doing and what he is doing, in case I ever need to do it.
I keep thinking, wow, if I feel helpless when it happens to Sugar M, think how I'd be if it happened to ol' Wifehorn. And I'd want to be the opposite of helpless. I'd want to fix EVERYTHING, that's how I roll. Except I know absolutely nothing, which might impinge slightly upon my healing talents.
So what does a husband do when he can't really do anything?
He's present. 24/7 he's there. He leaves me little love notes. He offers to go to the store if I so much as think about wanting something. He does the dishes. He feeds the cats. He reminds me of stuff I need/want to do. He hugs me when he walks past me. He listens when he needs to, and talks when he needs to. But mostly, he just loves me unconditionally.
"Mickey Mouse and I grew up together." - Ruthie Tompson, Disney animation checker and scene planner and one of the first women to become a member of the International Photographers Union in 1952.
"Choose your leaders with wisdom and forethought. To be led by a coward is to be controlled by all that the coward fears… To be led by a liar is to ask to be told lies." -Octavia E. Butler
Well heck, I do that - well, most of it - already. But if it works, don't fix it, I know that's a rule.
Husbanding is super important, and mostly fun.
I was at a wedding and the preacher looked at the guy and told him:
"If you have been faking who you are in order to get this young lady to marry you, your job from now on is to keep faking it. This is the person you told her you are, and that's who she's marrying. You have a solemn responsibility to make sure you're the guy you have been pretending to be, and not the real you, if those are two different people."
I decided right then and there, it would just be so much simpler just to be who I am all the time. I think that's the foundation for the whole rest of it.
"Choose your leaders with wisdom and forethought. To be led by a coward is to be controlled by all that the coward fears… To be led by a liar is to ask to be told lies." -Octavia E. Butler
I'm still tired and my energy is waning, so I'm going to be lazy and just paste what I posted on facebook earlier.
Home again, home again, jiggety jig!
I survived my first chemo. Of course I fell asleep before the nurse stopped talking and she had to wake me up to leave, but I'm home! I even packed a brand new journal to keep up with everything but I'll probably forego the initial entry of "I showed up, they started talking, I fell asleep, they woke me up and I went home." I put one of my Effing Birds stickers on the front of i that has a beautiful owl drawing and says "Fuck Off With That Shit." I thought that was appropriate for a cancer journal.
The nurse said energy level and motivation should be pretty good today and possibly tomorrow, but then I might fall off the cliff. No issues so far, though. My port was only placed about a week ago so there is some pain around the incision, but having that huge ass knitting needle sized needle inserted didn't hurt at all. I was really surprised it didn't but I should have known that The Fabulous Dr Baker would have fabulous nurses too..
Thank you to everyone who called, texted, emailed and messaged me today. I love you all and can't even imagine trying to get through this without y'all, even if I didn't respond (yet!) I have the best tribe of anyone on Earth. The only thing that could possibly have made it better today is if I had been half-festing in NOLA instead of sleeping in a chair with a pillow designed for someone 2 feet taller than me.
"Mickey Mouse and I grew up together." - Ruthie Tompson, Disney animation checker and scene planner and one of the first women to become a member of the International Photographers Union in 1952.
Sequoia32 wrote: ↑Thu Oct 14, 2021 5:39 pm
Sugar, wondering how you're doing.
Well and truly crappy today, but it will get better.
"Choose your leaders with wisdom and forethought. To be led by a coward is to be controlled by all that the coward fears… To be led by a liar is to ask to be told lies." -Octavia E. Butler