Offensive Language

[p0rtia]

Words are symbols. Various different words, in various different region, mean various different things. And by "mean" I mean not what the origin of the word is, or what class of similar words it belongs to; I mean the imagery, emotions, and memories that are conjured up in our heads.

Some words instantly reduce the value of certain human beings to shit. The C word, in this age, in the USA, is one of those words. The worthless female thing that has no other use than to be fucked.

[Suranis]

I'm sorry, but the Fogbow is an international forum, whether you like it or not. And Americans are not a majority of the worlds population. And the majority of the world Population use C*** in a completely different way than you do, no matter how you stick yourselves on your ivory towers about it. And when I have used the C word as it's natural for me I have been accused of the worst forms of hatred by people who really need to get several sticks out of their ass, and I was bullied for it. Foggy does not censor people but the members sure as hell do.

Newsflash, when people smoke Fags, they are not shooting homosexuals.

In short, grow the hell up. Not every hole is a Vagina.

[bill_g]

As with all situations, know your audience, and adjust accordingly.

[Slim Cognito]

I have no problem filtering myself for the occasion.

Also, I will say, one of my closest friends, (who has lived internationally) uses the c-word to describe her own...downstairs, in the context of how hard it is to meet "spongeworthy" people during a pandemic.

[Uninformed]

To me “swearing” is akin to racial/sexual/religious discrimination/harassment in that whether offence is taken or perceived is a matter for its recipient’s judgement.

I find it somewhat odd that if I use the “C” word it is not accompanied by any thought or connotation of females or the female anatomy. It seems the general extreme distaste for the word is the sole motivation for my using it. Contrarily, I find the use of many terms as offensive, no matter how “mild”, purely based on my perception of the intent behind their use.

[Suranis]

As with all situations, know your audience, and adjust accordingly.

Oh I do. The problem is that self censonship for one particular forum is never 100% so its going to slip out occasionally, and when it does I'm treated to WWE flying tackles, and getting strapped to the Stake for Crimes against humanity.

Also this is the only forum I've ever seen anyone have a problem with people using the word occasionally.

And ya, I'm with uninformed, I'm never thinking of Female Genitalia when I'm using the word, anymore than I'm think of homosexuals when I hear the word fag. It means cigarettes, by the way, and in fact makes more sense as slang for Cigarettes as Faggots were small sticks used to light fires. *shrug*

[Suranis]

I suppose I have to ask as an example - if you use the word Bitch, are you thinking of Female Dogs?

If you use the word B*stard - are you thinking of a person born out of wedlock?

[bill_g]

Oh I do. The problem is that self censonship for one particular forum is never 100% so its going to slip out occasionally, and when it does I'm treated to WWE flying tackles, and getting strapped to the Stake for Crimes against humanity.

Also this is the only forum I've ever seen anyone have a problem with people using the word occasionally.

And ya, I'm with uninformed, I'm never thinking of Female Genitalia when I'm using the word, anymore than I'm think of homosexuals when I hear the word fag. It means cigarettes, by the way, and in fact makes more sense as slang for Cigarettes as Faggots were small sticks used to light fires. *shrug*

This is why a little honest contrition helps sauve the unintended wounds. For example, the exchange between you and I not too long ago. With so many feet near the fire, kicking the coals is bound to happen. Best we have a little water always at the ready.

[Foggy]

... one of my closest friends, (who has lived internationally) uses the c-word to describe her own...downstairs ...

Oh I am definitely going to call some lady a "downstairs" next time one of them pisses me off.

"You ... you downstairs, you!"

And I understand Suranis's point, but there are a lot of women here who are rightfully indignant about the C-word, so it will remain censored. However, Mr. Smartypants Irish Dude, just because I love and adore you, you can use" downstairs " any time.

[Patagoniagirl]

Not using certain words that are hurtful, or offensive to others is called being decent and respectful. I try to start from there when considering my words. Especially when I am typing them out on a forum or social media.

[Dave from down under]

If you use the word B*stard - are you thinking of a person born out of wedlock?

Term of endearment/friendship down here if said the right way.
Otherwise fighting words..
Or an expression of how your day has been...

[Dave from down under]

By the by tw*t doesn’t have the genitalia meaning down here as far as I know.
It’s just used to refer to an ignorant or obnoxious or snobby person.

[bob]

Some words instantly reduce the value of certain human beings to shit. The C word, in this age, in the USA, is one of those words. The worthless female thing that has no other use than to be fucked.

Although I agree with p0rtia's second sentence's sentiment, debates over what certain words mean in certain contexts in certain cultures is too many trees and too little forest.

This thread was started because this forum (i.e., Fogbow I and this iteration) has an inauspicious history of being a bit of a frat house. And I appreciate Foogy's leadership in making the forum more inclusive and welcoming to all.

But some members have been asked repeatedly not to denigrate women just for being women. Of all the horrible things that Kellianne Conway, Sydney Powell, Sara Sanders, Orly Taitz, etc., have done, being women is not the list. It is easy enough to belittle their deeds without referencing their gender, their appearance, etc.

And I think we're here now because the polite (or even impolite) requests to "do better" are not being taken to heart.

[LM K]

Although I agree with p0rtia's second sentence's sentiment, debates over what certain words mean in certain contexts in certain cultures is too many trees and too little forest.

This thread was started because this forum (i.e., Fogbow I and this iteration) has an inauspicious history of being a bit of a frat house. And I appreciate Foogy's leadership in making the forum more inclusive and welcoming to all.

But some members have been asked repeatedly not to denigrate women just for being women. Of all the horrible things that Kellianne Conway, Sydney Powell, Sara Sanders, Orly Taitz, etc., have done, being women is not the list. It is easy enough to belittle their deeds without referencing their gender, their appearance, etc.

And I think we're here now because the polite (or even impolite) requests to "do better" are not being taken to heart.

Basically, when a community says "whoa, that's really offensive", I adjust my language accordingly. It's about respect. I know which of my religious friends don't care about foul language and which find foul language offensive. I adjust my vocabulary accordingly.

(Once in class, I tripped. Out came "Jesus Christ!". I know many of my students are religious and might find the phrase offensive. Well, I didn't intend to use the phrase in front of students, and just ignored that I used a phrase I would never purposefully use in class. Intention matters.)

[neonzx]

Moving this here, since this is the right place currently....

Please. We do not use the Nword, and for good reason. Supposedly quoting the offensive racial slur because someone else used it is no excuse.

I'd prefer not to blog in a cesspool.

I don't think he meant ill or insulting to disparage by using that word, and I don't think it rises to the level of the C-word, or the N-word, nor the faggot word (I can say it cause I'm gay and we own that word -- just like Blacks own the N-word).

I've said before I live in a community of immigrants -- one of my best friends here is from Brazil. He's a couple years younger than me. Caucasian. He and his wife have a couple of kids (born here). About a year ago, I was at his home and his 14yo son was there... and I heard my friend jokingly say to his son "Yo, my nigga". I had to interject and explain why that's not a joke. My friend has only been here since 2004. He said, "But they say it in the movies and in the music."

He knew no better. What are we teaching?

[sterngard friegen]

Twice in less than a week?

Please.

[sugar magnolia]

Moving this here, since this is the right place currently....

(I can say it cause I'm gay and we own that word -- just like Blacks own the N-word).

You own that word? So you think it's ok for Blacks to say the N-word because they own it? The N-word is offensive regardless of the context. How do you not know that?

[neonzx]

Moving this here, since this is the right place currently....

(I can say it cause I'm gay and we own that word -- just like Blacks own the N-word).

You own that word? So you think it's ok for Blacks to say the N-word because they own it? The N-word is offensive regardless of the context. How do you not know that?

I think it's ok to an extent that it muffles the pain of a word. Do gays own the faggot word. Yeah, for much the same reason. You can't hurt someone when the word loses it's power.

I don't use that word -- only here because of this specific discussion.

And, as I said, with the N-word -- what are we teaching through our film and music? Are we helping?

[Gregg]

When I see or hear the c-word, I ask myself if the person using the word is from Great Britain. The word simply isn't offensive across the pond, thus the role of intention becomes important.

It influenced my instant use, but the fact is I'm a American who grew up in an Appalachian environment, so I didn't get it at home and anything I learned by going to Britain I should have learned better than to use that word over here. I said it, I'm sorry. I wasn't even thinking of a woman but a very specific fraternity house. But still. I said it, I offended people, I wish I had not.

A lot of the questionable words I use are meant to be ironic and I certainly know better. I will try to sit back and count to 10 before posting, but the fact of the matter is, discussing my rage using words that offend people is kind of what I do. I want you to be as offended at me saying what they're doing to "the colored folk" as I am, and by referring to them in my protagonists voice thus, I'm trying to make you as mad as I am, at whatever it is that I'm mad at. Which is a very long list.

If anyone wants to bombard me with rotten fruit, perhaps this summer we can work that into the schedule, so you can come on up to my battlefield and bonk me on the nose with a rotten cantelope.

Until then, just remember, "If you want to stop war and stuff, ya gotta sing loud!"

Arlo Guthrie said that, and made a lot of people mad at him, too.

[LM K]

It's all good, Gregg. I know it wasn't your intention to offend some and don't think you should be pilloried. Wordz be hard. All of this has stimulated an excellent discussion.

[Uninformed]

[sterngard friegen]

I'm not so easily assuaged by anything less than a full apology and a commitment to stop using slurs. The excuses and purported explanations have been pathetic. There is no apology and there is no commitment to stop. Those of you who have given this poster a pass either condone or encourage him doing it again. Or someone else doing it.

I don't appreciate this site becoming a cesspool of racial, religious or sexual slurs.

STOP IT!

[SlimSloSlider]

As someone raised bilingual in Ireland, my swear words are not your swear words.
Québecers use religion-related words - calice, tabernac, sacrement, hostis - chalice, tabernacle, sacrament, host.
Completely inoffensive in English, they may be strung into a rosary of inflammatory invective that peels paint from walls, sours milk and puts the child in the cradle crying. Mon ostis de calisse de tabernac de saint sacrement!
Urdu may be the best language for swearing - but mostly sexual and involving camels.
Language is a delicate dance and as a neophyte in the US and having lived among Cockneys, I appreciate the abhorrence of a word equating someone to female genitalia casually tossed.
Best learn to swear in some language nobody will understand.

Thalla is cagainn bruis!

[LM K]

I'm not so easily assuaged by anything less than a full apology and a commitment to stop using slurs. The excuses and purported explanations have been pathetic. There is no apology and there is no commitment to stop. Those of you who have given this poster a pass either condone or encourage him doing it again. Or someone else doing it.

I don't appreciate this site becoming a cesspool of racial, religious or sexual slurs.

STOP IT!

Sternie no one is condoning the language. Many members have participated in a brilliant and thought-provoking discussion. Fogbow isn't becoming a cesspool. People have shared their sincere thoughts and feelings.

Continuing to beat this horse will make this so hopefully and likely solved problem So. Much. Worse.

[Uninformed]

Shazbat!