Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#26

Post by Jez »

THE TWEEDLES ARE OUT NEXT FRIDAY!!!!

Somehow she got approved for an apartment that she is not going to be able to afford, but as a friend of mine likes to say: Not my circus, not my monkey.

Once she is out, we wash our hands of her. She is going to be paying us back for everything we have spent to get her into her new place. I wrote up a simple Repayment Plan document and we will be filling the final amounts and coming up with a monthly amount she must pay us or we take her to small claims court. We have receipts. Since it's going to be over $1000 we are spending just to get the bitch out of our lives, we want at least some of that money back.

That money was going originally set aside to redo the deck, but I think this will be better for our sanity.
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#27

Post by MN-Skeptic »

:banana: :cheer: :banana:
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#28

Post by Azastan »

Don't expect to see any of that money back, but sometimes it's worth it just to get rid of a nuisance/junk pile.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#29

Post by Jez »

Azastan wrote: Fri May 04, 2018 10:48 am Don't expect to see any of that money back, but sometimes it's worth it just to get rid of a nuisance/junk pile.
I don't really expect it, truthfully. But, we gotta try and set some expectations for her. She is an idiot. That I recognize, but we gotta try.
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#30

Post by Sam the Centipede »

Jez wrote: Fri May 04, 2018 10:56 am
Azastan wrote: Fri May 04, 2018 10:48 am Don't expect to see any of that money back, but sometimes it's worth it just to get rid of a nuisance/junk pile.
I don't really expect it, truthfully. But, we gotta try and set some expectations for her. She is an idiot. That I recognize, but we gotta try.
Excellent! A generous and realistic attitude. As you clearly appreciate, it's important that you don't let her occupy your head in the same way she occupied your house. That's definitely more important than recovering the money, so you can regard any money you do receive as a bonus, a dollop of joy rather than a teaspoon of old bile.

If it makes her a better person, that's a double bonus.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#31

Post by Jez »

THE TWEEDLES ARE GONE!!!

Friday afternoon, the movers came, packed them up and took them away! Cost another $300 cash out of my pocket to pay for the movers, but I'm considering it an investment in my sanity. A small aside: She was supposed to keep hold of some cash to help pay for the movers. Of course she didn't. And I didn't think she would, because that is just how she is. So her net investment in her move was exactly $35, which was the cost of the application for the apartment complex.

Friday night was a steak dinner, mimosas and taking stock of wall damage. We pulled 17 nails out of the walls in her room because she had to hang stuff. Friday night was also spraying down the rooms with bug spray. Along the floors, in the closets, along the walls... just to be sure.

Saturday we vacuumed the rooms and Stanley Steamer came by and cleaned and deodorized the rooms. The doors have been closed since then. Then D went to go to her parents for Mother's Day.

Saturday I also went and bought a mattress! Yes! A real mattress! 8 months of sleeping on an air bed is soon to be over!!! It should arrive on Monday! Then I can get the bed frame set up (which I might do tonight anyway) and sleep in an actual, real bed. Upstairs.

Makes me happy. :fiesta:
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#32

Post by realist »

:thumbs:
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#33

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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#34

Post by Maybenaut »

:thumbs:
"Hey! You know, we left this England place because it was bogus. So if we don't get some cool rules ourselves, pronto, we'll just be bogus too." - Thomas Jefferson
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#35

Post by Whatever4 »

Awesome! :thumbs: :bunny:
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#36

Post by kate520 »

:swoon: :bighug: :bighug: :cheer1:
DEFEND DEMOCRACY
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#37

Post by SLQ »

Enjoy your peace and quiet! (This goes to show that sadly, sometimes throwing money at a problem can solve it.)
"Try not. Do or do not. There is no try."
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#38

Post by Jez »

Today, D and I decided to go through the kitchen cupboards, drawers, and pantry and get it organized and take stock of what we have. Also, turns out, what is missing.

There were some different types of paprika (yes, most think paprika is paprika... really it isn't), most of which are now gone. We have one bottle of the smoked paprika left.
About 1/4 of the spices are missing. Mostly duplicate jars, so no biggie.
A bottle of handcrafted vanilla extract that some friends made for me. The label on the bottle clearly states that it is a gift from my friends.
And one of my steak knives. Now this isn't one of those set of 4 for $10 you can get at Walmart. This was a set of four Henckel's steak knives that are only sold in sets of four. I'm now missing one. The set retails for $400. Of course I didn't pay that. Between my employee discount during my seasonal employment at the kitchen supplies store and the sale the store was having, I paid much less. But, the fact remains, that my knife is missing.

To say that I'm not happy is putting it mildly. I'm almost livid. I'm very close to driving over to her apartment and ransacking the place to look for my knife and vanilla.

But... I won't. Because I'm just glad the bitch is gone.
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#39

Post by Azastan »

Sometimes it is better just to let sleeping dogs alone, you know?

Not satisfying, but much safer.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#40

Post by Sugar Magnolia »

Drop off a pre-paid, pre-addressed mailing envelope and a "very nice" note asking for the return of the knife and vanilla, because you "just know" they "accidentally" got mixed in with their stuff when they were packing.

You'll either get it/them back, or you'll be out $5 or so for the postage. Either way, you won't be any worse off and you might actually be surprised.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#41

Post by Jez »

Found the vanilla finally. Well, the empty bottle anyway. Which means at some point she used almost half a bottle of hand-crafted vanilla extract. I've given up on the knife. She will plead ignorance and we would rather get paid back then have her get pissed off and decide to stiff us. So, I'll just save up for another set of knives. They go on sale quite frequently thru the manufacturers website.
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#42

Post by Jez »

Updates.

Tweedle paid her first installment, on-time, early even. I think she will probably continue to pay. Her FB posts sound like she really likes her job, so that is great.

Now... I am going to block Craigslist on D's computer. She found another person looking for a room last month. Person said she was employed, had a cat and small dog. She thought, sounds good. Talked to her on the phone a few times. Then we met her. She seemed nice, so we both said, let's give it a try.

Well, about 6 weeks later we are attempting eviction. She hasn't paid of dime of rent. She developed pancreatitis, which I know can be painful, but she keeps going from ER to ER, ignoring doctor's advice on what she should be eating to give her pancreas a rest or not over stress it, but she ignores it. She is a 44 year old woman that throws temper tantrums like a 6 year old. She is a drama queen that will "pass out" on the kitchen floor then get pissed when you call an ambulance. Which happened Monday which lead to a blow out.

She lost her job this morning for no call no show several days in a row. Why? Because of the "intense pain" she is in with her pancreas.

Oh, did I mention she called the cops? And apparently this is not the first time someone has had to go through eviction proceedings with her. She will drag this out as long as possible. Why someone would stay where they are not wanted, I'll never understand. I get that it might take a few days to find another place, but her parents live in the area. She supposedly has other friends. Couch surf for awhile until you can get back on your feet.

As of Monday, she is a ghost to me. If she asks me a direct question, I will answer it, briefly. Otherwise, she's a ghost.

Right now, she is up in the kitchen, head on the counter (it's a bar style counter, with high stools) sobbing uncontrollably. D and I just went about our morning routine and ignored it. I'm downstairs in my office, working a bit, venting to you good people here a bit.

D and I are going to try and make it with just us. And after I block Craigslist from her computers and phone, we might give the traveling nurses thing a shot, which was the original plan. But until we get this idiot out of this house, we can't do a thing.

As an aside: I have a friend that lives in the Charlotte, NC area. She has offered to let me and Lola come visit for a few days if necessary. I'm tempted, but at the same time, I don't want to leave D here to deal with all this by herself. It's a :pickle:
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#43

Post by MN-Skeptic »

:grouphug:

Well, that just sucks. I sure hope things get better for you. Until then, come here for hugs.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#44

Post by DejaMoo »

Jez wrote: Wed Jul 25, 2018 8:47 am Oh, did I mention she called the cops? And apparently this is not the first time someone has had to go through eviction proceedings with her. She will drag this out as long as possible.


She's a pro. She's well-versed in tenant's rights laws and knows how to be a successful parasite.
Why someone would stay where they are not wanted, I'll never understand.
1. Money. These types specialize in taking advantage of sympathetic people and inexperienced landlords, because they get to live rent-free for months before the legal process finally forces them out.
2. To fuck with people. It is very hard for regular folk to grasp this (until they've experienced it firsthand), but yes, truly, there are people who enjoy making life hell for others. They get a great deal of pleasure from it.

There are two red flags for these personality types that you ignore at your peril.
A. Whatever happens in their life, it's always someone else's fault. In this case, she played you with the horrible hospital mistreating her, and of course you believed her, because the normal adult doesn't freely blame others. But later, you realized she's the one mistreating herself.
B. They're always looking for sympathy. Think about it: most normal adults do not readily share their troubles with just anybody. We tend to keep them to ourselves, at least at first, then eventually unburden ourselves to only a trusted few. Beware of the adult who too readily shares his or her troubles, trying to get your sympathy. You are being manipulated. Best to back away.
I get that it might take a few days to find another place, but her parents live in the area. She supposedly has other friends. Couch surf for awhile until you can get back on your feet.
Her friends and family are fully aware of what she is doing, which is why she's no longer welcome there.

These types are the landlords' worst nightmare, and they aren't as rare as you'd think. They're why landlords screen prospective tenants, and why, if D would like to continue to share her home with others, it would be best to hire an experienced firm to pre-screen applicants, or learn how to do it correctly herself. By 'correctly', I mean finding and using the reputable background checks resources that are used by employers and landlords. These are not just any old online site that offers to run a background check for free or a fee.
D and I are going to try and make it with just us. And after I block Craigslist from her computers and phone, we might give the traveling nurses thing a shot, which was the original plan. But until we get this idiot out of this house, we can't do a thing.
D needs to keep in mind that anytime she lets anyone stay in her home for a few days, she's creating a tenancy situation which, if the person is the wrong sort, can lead to these sorts of situations. The risk is always there.

Best of luck to you and D with this one. It is just so infuriating how parasites are so successful at finding kind, sympathetic people to take advantage of. :madguy: :madguy:
I've heard this bull before.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#45

Post by RoadScholar »

In my non-professional opinion, it sounds like she is so close to the edge emotionally that she could become violent towards you.

Please proceed with caution. :bighug:
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#46

Post by GlimDropper »

I haven't been following this thread closely so pardon me if this is mentioned somewhere but who owns the house?

I'm not an expert on landlord tenant (or any other type of) law but I used to help my parents manage their rental properties and there are some very helpful tenant screening services that have proven to be well worth their fairly modest fees. What I do not know off hand is if you need to be the property owner to legally use them.

I'm not endorsing this website but they do look fairly respectable and the info is tailored for the state of Ohio. Their fee for their lowest level report is $19 with a full credit report added for $10 more. Their info sheet is here. Considering how long and how expensive evictions can be, those fees can very well be worth paying.
Edit: Oh, one hard earned tip in the tenant screening process, the second most recent landlord is usually the one who gives you the best info. They have no motive to lie to you about a potential nightmare tenant where the soon to be former landlord just might be trying to dump a problem (but paying) tenant on you. Live and learn.
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#47

Post by Jez »

D owns the house. The Traveling Nurses website does the screening and was recommended by an RN friend of D's that actually does the traveling thing, or did for a long time anyway. She got tired of traveling so now works as a nursing admin in a hospital.

The traveling nurses are at a hospital for 6-8 weeks. They just want a place to stay and pay cash. There are furnished apartments that charge 1500+ per month. We aren't asking that much, of course. Anyway, we'll have to see what kind of damage is done to the room anyway.
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#48

Post by Whatever4 »

You got my idiot sister! Wow!
"[Moderate] doesn't mean you don't have views. It just means your views aren't predictable ideologically one way or the other, and you're trying to follow the facts where they lead and reach your own conclusions."
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#49

Post by Jez »

Ok. D and B had a long talk last night. And since I'm a cold heartless bitch that doesn't give a crap what B does, as long as she leaves and soon, I let D handle it. She still has a heart and sounds much nicer than me.

B is leaving. But she is having a procedure next week Friday (outpatient) on her pancreas. D is being nice and letting her stay until then, but she must be gone within 2 days of the procedure. We don't care where she goes, she just has to go.

So progress.

And yes, the paperwork is still going to be filed with the court. That happens tomorrow.

Since yesterday B has been very quiet and deferential. And no, I don't buy it for a second. I'm keeping to myself, in the basement, on my computers. the less I am around the better.
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.

~Khalil Gibran
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Re: Roommate Issues, aka Why I Sometimes Dislike Humans

#50

Post by woodworker »

Jez wrote: Wed Apr 11, 2018 10:00 am Here we are, 6 or so months later. I'm still in Ohio and survived the basement flood of November 2017. Lost my TV and insurance didn't cover anything because it was a flood. Oh well, dealt with it an moved on. We do have leak issues with the basement. When it warms a bit, and stops raining, we will be sealing the cement floors and walls in the basement. The water table is fairly high here and it's been a wet winter/spring, which doesn't help at all. Sometimes the water comes right up through small cracks in the floor, even with the sump pump running.

Shannon and Shandy (whom I call the Tweedles, collectively) are still here. Dawn was going to be giving her a 30 day move out notice at the beginning of March, but she decided that Shannon deserves the month to find a job since she told her she needed to find a job in March. Not that she needed to have a job by March. *rubs bridge of nose and sighs heavily*

Tweedle Sr (TS) has had a grand total of ONE job interview since March 1, and that was last week. Now Dawn is waiting to see if she gets the job she interviewed for (CSR for a regional bank call center). If I had to make a guess, I would say No, she didn't get the job. It's a new call center with 50 openings. You can guarantee that a minimum of 200 people applied, and of those 200 I would say at least half had call center experience. Tweedle Sr has been living off of her daughter's SSDI for the last several years.

I've talked to Dawn several times about setting a firm date on when she is going to have "the talk" with the Tweedles. She hems and haws and makes excuses.

A few of the reasons that she needs to go:
  • TS barely keeps her bathroom clean. There is literal fecal matter splashed on the toilet. Not to mention the used toilet paper that has been deposited in the waste basket. And I don't mean used as in "blew the snot out of my nose". I mean used as in "wiped my ass after some explosive diarrhea".
  • She refuses to socialize and just stays in her bedroom for hours at a time, only venturing out to make something for her daughter to eat.
  • Speaking of food: She leaves leftovers sitting on the counter all day and sometimes over night. They are in plastic containers, but un-refrigerated. Just left out on the counter to stay warm. This is food with meat, sauces, cheese, etc. It's not like it's some veggies that she left out, because neither of them eat ANY vegetables. TS goes as far as to even pick out onions from something that has been cooked. Actually, I take that back, they will eat potatoes.
  • She is "broke" but apparently has the funds to buy random stuff off Amazon. She gets almost daily packages from them, and I have no idea what is in most of them.
  • Personal hygiene is a suggestion, not a practice.
  • Does not help with the chores around the house (vacuuming, dusting, dishes, etc) unless she is reminded or asked to do it. Both D and I work all day long. The least she could do is the occasional dish in the sink, but she will ONLY wash dishes that either her or her daughter use. There could be a bowl or plate in the sink from the night before or the morning when D is putting together her lunch for the day, and it will sit there. She will wash around it. I usually end up doing the dishes at lunch. I don't mind. Helps keep the communal area clean.
That is the short list. I'm not even going to start about her personality and her sense of entitlement and that everyone owes her for her existence. Her daughter has the same attitude and has learned well at her mother's knee.

I'm just about done with it. D is going to have to drop the hammer on those two soon or I'm gone. I don't know where I'll go or anything like that, but I cannot stay in this house much longer with those two. For my own sanity, I can't. Only bad thing is I promised my next move would be out to the Seattle area, but I cannot afford that right now.
I provide extra judicial eviction services.
bring out the tumbrils. I am so fucking filled with pain and anger at what is going on in this country. I do deeply believe that if trump somehow retains power it will be the end of democracy in this country and the end of this country as we know it.
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