OK, that's the best argument yet against there being a pee tape.
But my inner 13-year old WANTS TO SEE THE PEE TAPE.
Like, they said the ladies were dancing around on the bed where Barack and Michelle slept, while they were peeing.
Have you ever tried that? It's hard enough to dance around on a bed WITHOUT peeing. But OK, maybe they were athletic ladies with a good sense of balance. Maybe the ceiling fan wasn't low enough to bop 'em in the headbone. I dunno. But now try dancing around while you're peeing (Narrator: Do NOT do this indoors, not even in the bathroom). I don't know about you, but when I'm peeing, I'm kind of rooted to the spot, you know what I mean?
Did I tell you the story about when I was driving in Eastern Washington and stopped to pee in the pitch dark, and a horsie came running to see me and scared the
crap pee out of me? I didn't know it was a horsie, I just knew something huge, quite possibly a hungry space alien monster or sumpin', but something BIG, was running straight at me in the total blackout darkness, getting closer and closer and CLOSER,
![Surprised :o](./images/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif)
but I couldn't run away and hide because 1) there was nothing to hide behind for a hundred miles in any direction ... you ever been in Eastern Washington?, and 2) I was PEEING, and I couldn't stop and run away, much less dance around like I was on a king-size hotel bed in Moscow, Russia under a really high ceiling fan. When you're peeing, you can't dance around, not even when a huge monster is running toward you to eat you in total darkness, is my personal experience. You pretty much have to stand there and finish your pee. If that means the monster gets you, oh well.
So I have to see the pee tape. That's final.
And besides, what would happen to my favorite Trump joke?
► Show Spoiler
Q. What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
A. Trump never paid to see a garbanzo bean.
See what I mean about my inner 13 year old?