Weird Headlines

[Volkonski]

New York man convicted of selling sharks on the internet

https://abcnews.go.com/US/york-man-conv ... itter_abcn

The only water that runs through New York's Dutchess County is the Hudson River, known for Northern Pike, Atlantic Sturgeon and the occasional odd whale. So authorities became curious when they learned a Dutchess County man was selling sharks.

It turned out that Joshua Seguine had been keeping live sharks in a pool at his home and offering them for sale on the internet.

Seguine, 40, was convicted Wednesday in LaGrange, New York, of illegal trafficking and ordered to pay a $5,000 fine. He pleaded not guilty.

“The tide has turned for Joshua Seguine, who was convicted and held accountable for his unlawful acts,” said New York Attorney General Letitia James. “We will not tolerate anyone who preys on protected species to line their pockets.”

[Uninformed]

“Mystery tree beast turns out to be croissant”:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56757956

[Phoenix520]

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

“Mystery tree beast turns out to be croissant”:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56757956

Looks like a croissant tree to me.

[Maybenaut]

“Mystery tree beast turns out to be croissant”:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56757956

Looks like a croissant tree to me.

Some mother in Poland: “Stop wasting food! Croissants don’t grow on trees, ya know!”

[Tiredretiredlawyer]

[MN-Skeptic]

‘WW2 bomb’ found in Bavarian forest was sex toy, say officials

A German police bomb squad called to investigate a suspected hand grenade in a Bavarian forest has revealed that the object was a rubber sex toy.

A jogger reported finding a bag containing the device on Monday in a forest outside the city of Passau, near Germany’s borders with Austria and the Czech Republic.

The discovery of forgotten or hidden munitions is a regular occurrence in Germany more than 75 years after the end of the second world war.

When the bomb squad arrived and inspected the contents of the bag, they determined it was a rubber grenade replica. The condoms and lubricant in the bag helped point to the device’s intended use, police told the German news agency dpa.

“An internet search confirmed the suspicion,” police said. “There are actually sex toys in the form of hand grenades.”

[Suranis]

Guys... if you need a frigging hand grenade to make sex fun, maybe you should revaluate what you actually want out of sex or whether sex is right for you at all...

[zekeb]

Guys... if you need a frigging hand grenade to make sex fun, maybe you should revaluate what you actually want out of sex or whether sex is right for you at all...

Well Suranis, I just got out of the "more you get, the more you want" phase just a mere few months ago.

[Foggy]

Guys... if you need a frigging hand grenade to make sex fun, maybe you should revaluate what you actually want out of sex or whether sex is right for you at all...

I don't know about you, Mr. Irish Smartypants, but here in 'Merika we use guns as substitutes for large penises. How big a jump is it from that to hand grenades?

' Course, it's Germany. Ya never really know about Germany.

[Suranis]

grenade.jpg (39.94 KiB) Viewed 27356 times

German Grenades... umm...

[Uninformed]

Guys... if you need a frigging hand grenade to make sex fun, maybe you should revaluate what you actually want out of sex or whether sex is right for you at all...

I don't know about you, Mr. Irish Smartypants, but here in 'Merika we use guns as substitutes for large penises. How big a jump is it from that to hand grenades?

' Course, it's Germany. Ya never really know about Germany.

I suppose a hand grenade is more likely to give the feeling of the earth moving than a gun but one really needs to use something with greater explosive force. Anything from a C4 demolition block to a small thermonuclear device seems more appropriate depending on the desired experience.

[fierceredpanda]

Guys... if you need a frigging hand grenade to make sex fun, maybe you should revaluate what you actually want out of sex or whether sex is right for you at all...

I don't know about you, Mr. Irish Smartypants, but here in 'Merika we use guns as substitutes for large penises. How big a jump is it from that to hand grenades?

Guns and pickup trucks.

Off Topic

As far as the Germans being obsessed with things that go "boom," let's just bear in mind that a lot of "energetic materials" research (i.e., finding new things that go "boom") takes place there, including work contracted by the US military. One scientist over there with whom I am vaguely familiar - being, as I am, a font of useless knowledge - is Thomas Klapötke, whose Wikipedia page includes this charming tidbit for those initiated:

A flavour of the "exciting" nature of his research interests comes from the "Things I Won't Work With" thread of the Chemistry blog "In The Pipeline", which introduces that day's topic thus: "But remember, N-amino azidotetrazole is the starting material for the work I'm talking about today. It's a base camp, familiar territory, merely a jumping-off point in the quest for still more energetic compounds. The most alarming of them has two carbons, fourteen nitrogens, and no hydrogens at all, a formula that even Klapötke himself, who clearly has refined sensibilities when it comes to hellishly unstable chemicals, calls exciting. ... The compound exploded in solution, it exploded on any attempts to touch or move the solid, and (most interestingly) it exploded when they were trying to get an infrared spectrum of it."

For context, and those who don't know this bit of chemistry: Nitrogen atoms are just dying to triple bond with another nitrogen to form N₂ gas, and they release quite a lot of energy in the process. More nitrogens, in other words, means more bang.

In other words, by German standards, a grenade seems fairly tame and serene.

[qbawl]

grenade.jpg

German Grenades... umm...

Potato masher.

[Jim]

13-mile chase ends when driver comes face to face with ‘Bovine Unit,’ Wisconsin cops say

This wasn’t your typical roadblock.

A herd of dairy cows is credited with helping authorities nab a suspect after a 13-mile chase Monday night in Wisconsin.

The police pursuit began in Barron and continued through the rural area until it ended on a farm with the driver coming face to face with the cows, according to the Barron County Sheriff’s Office.

“We would be remiss if we didn’t thank the Barron County Bovine Unit for jumping into the fray when the vehicle came into their patrol area,” the sheriff’s office posted on Facebook.

The sheriff’s office couldn’t resist a pun.

[keith]

Australian TV has a traditional 'weird headline' roundup on "Shaun McAlleff's 'Mad As Hell'

[AndyinPA]

Australian TV has a traditional 'weird headline' roundup on "Shaun McAlleff's 'Mad As Hell'

I get message video not available in my country.

[northland10]

Keith lives down under which is why he can see it but not us.

[Jim]

Man, that karma has one hell of a sense of humor...

Boaters rescue group hurling anti-gay abuse at them after their boat explodes

It could be viewed as a dramatic demonstration of the concept of karma: a group of young boaters hurling homophobic abuse towards another vessel flying gay pride flags, then needing to be rescued by their intended victims when their own boat explodes into a ball of flame.

Sunday’s incident on Washington state’s Lake Moses occurred two days before the start of June, which is known as gay pride month because of demonstrations and celebrations centered on the annual pride parades in cities around the world to commemorate the Stonewall uprising for LGBTQ equal rights in New York in 1969.

Video of last weekend’s happenings has gone viral on TikTok, amassing more than 8m views and prompting an investigation by the Grant county sheriff, Tom Jones.

“We got them out of the water safely, we were nicer than they were,” the video’s author posted alongside the clip, noting that the three people rescued, two men and a woman, did not offer any thanks.

[keith]

Australian TV has a traditional 'weird headline' roundup on "Shaun McAlleff's 'Mad As Hell'

I get message video not available in my country.

Sorry. Didnt realuze it was geoblcked. May a VPN could make it work?

[RTH10260]

VPN located in Perth made it appear in the Swiss Alps

[Patagoniagirl]

Serial Trump Pooper Caught.

"
JUNE 3--A 70-year-old Ohio man who told cops he was a “Trump man” confessed to repeatedly urinating and defecating in front of a neighbor’s home because the residents "are Democrats and support Joe Biden," according to a police report.

Jerry Detrick, the accused septuagenarian serial pooper, was cited Sunday for littering after the homeowner caught him in the act around 3:15 AM in Greenville, a western Ohio city."

jerrydetrick21.jpg (69.13 KiB) Viewed 26448 times

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/ ... euLpyC3yed

[noblepa]

Serial Trump Pooper Caught.

"
JUNE 3--A 70-year-old Ohio man who told cops he was a “Trump man” confessed to repeatedly urinating and defecating in front of a neighbor’s home because the residents "are Democrats and support Joe Biden," according to a police report.

Jerry Detrick, the accused septuagenarian serial pooper, was cited Sunday for littering after the homeowner caught him in the act around 3:15 AM in Greenville, a western Ohio city."


jerrydetrick21.jpg

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/ ... euLpyC3yed

Well, Trump supporters ARE full of ...

[MsDaisy]

Serial Trump Pooper Caught.

Well, Trump supporters ARE full of ...

Oh if we could only send Drop Dead Fred to Mar-a-Lago
"Yucky yucky smelly dog poo"

[Uninformed]

“Medieval pointy-toed shoes led to Cambridge bunion surge”:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-c ... e-57427365